![]() ![]() Hell, I’d say that alone is reason enough for you to wildly presume I would make a Vampire Survivors film. ![]() How about that Vampire Survivors thing? I made a movie about vampires, there’s some dots worth connecting there. Let’s get a bit more recent in this section. You’d like that wouldn’t you? Keep dreaming, sucker. Boy, isn’t it something to hear those words bounce around in your head associated with my name? Can you imagine my voice saying them? What a nice thought that is, your old pal John making a scary alien picture again starring Isaac from Dead Space. Let me rattle off a few classics first: Sonic the Hedgehog, Fallout, and of course, Dead Space. Journos, on your marks! Get those article-writing fingers ready, I’m gonna make it real easy for you to wring a few listicles out of my game ramblings! I might even mention games I haven’t played, and I’ll just say I’ve heard of them to tease you! The important thing is that my name gets jumbled up with them in the big SEO machine, of course, and I think I’m about ready to get started. It’s time for me to step into an interview, mention a bunch of miscellaneous video games I’ve been playing in my retirement, then vaguely allude to the idea that I possibly would maybe like to adapt a film version of one of them at some point in the future while you cats all lose your heads about it. Are you ready for another one of my classic teases? You know the drill by now, I’m sure. What’s up, lowlifes? It’s me, renowned old man, horror film director, and master of cheap tricks John Carpenter. ![]()
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